It’s a habit from when he was smaller and he can’t get over it.
He doesn’t want to get over it really.
Feeling the steady beating of Bucky’s heart, the rise and fall of his chest, the strong arms wrapped around him (the cool press of the metal is new but adds to experience)… everything just comes together to make sure Steve is constantly draped over Bucky’s body no matter how much the other man groans and rolls his eyes.
The house is quiet, almost too quiet. A few hours earlier the halls and the cosy living room were filled with family and friends all dressed in black. Now only Dean remains. Sam was the last to go, with a tearful hug good-bye then out the door he went, wobbling down the sidewalk with his cane. There’s still platters of fruits and vegetables laying around in the kitchen and those little housewarming sausages that are customary on occasions like this. Dean should probably put them away, but he doesn’t want to. Putting things away will only remind him more of what, or rather who is missing.
His suit is mussed, wrinkled from comforting hands patting his shoulder and multiple teary-eyed hugs. There’s a coffee stain on his white shirt and a berry stain on his jacket. Thankfully, his blue tie remains clean and backwards, just how it should be. A few heartwarming gifts litter the couch, Dean supposes he could put those away as well, but there’s something he needs to do first. He places his hands on the wheels of his wheelchair and pushes himself down the hallway. His eyes are drawn to the pictures hanging on the wall, he shouldn’t look at those now, but it’s too late, tears are already rushing to his eyes.
The first picture he sees is of his wedding day. Cas is looking at him and Dean is looking at Cas, they’re smiling happily, hands clasped together. There’s so much love in both of their eyes a knot grows in Dean’s throat. Too soon. Cas looks so young there, even though he wasn’t. Dean was forty when they got married, but better late than never. Dean still remembers that day as clear as a bell. It wasn’t a big wedding, they didn’t have many friends at the time and only recently had stopped hunting. Sam was there of course, crying like the little baby he is. Jody showed up and even Charlie managed to get her way out of Oz. Dean told her she didn’t have to come but Charlie insisted, telling him she, “wouldn’t miss the most important wedding ever.” Dean thought she was ridiculous at the time but looking back, she was kinda right. It took ten years fighting against the powers of heaven and hell to finally bring them together. Ten years for Dean to let himself fall in love with his best friend. Ten years for Dean to finally decide to do something he wanted for once and allow happiness in the form of a certain fallen angel to be in his life.
Their wedding may have been a small affair but it was and still is the happiest day of Dean’s life.